But... I LOVE You
In the summer of 2001 Cherry, an artist in her late twenties met Jim, her future soul mate, and they spent the next seven years together. After two years, Cherry was to discover this period had just been the ‘honeymoon’ stage; furthermore, that her partner was harboring other secrets in addition to a hidden Jekyll-and-Hyde personality.
During the ensuing years she attempted to leave twice with her babies, but went back for the sake of their young family and the emotional blackmail of; 'But... I LOVE you’. With her health eroding and at a loss to find any medical answers, Cherry eventually became bedridden and used this unforeseen opportunity to separate from her partner for good; only to discover that Jim was about to punish her in the most painful way imaginable. After seeking legal advice she was informed as to what he truly was; a narcissist. All the years of verbal and emotional abuse and behavior fell into place. Unfortunately, leaving was only the beginning. A true New Zealand story. Available at Lulu.com or at Amazon.com and in New Zealand through Trademe.co.nz. This book is also featured through the Sophie Elliot Foundation. Please leave your reviews on Amazon as I love to hear from my readers! |
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REVIEWS
mightywarrior 2014
A real life compelling read about the insidious nature of emotional abuse, power & control
How does a healthy, happy young women from a "normal" family background, end up staying in an
emotionally abusive relationship? What brings someone to the point of getting out for good? What are
some of the difficulties they might encounter on the journey to freedom? This book answers some
questions & is helpful for anyone who has a family member or friend trapped in this situation. Also
insightful for health professionals, community workers, social service agencies etc.
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Elsie Mae 2014.
"A poignant rendition of the realities of one's life entrapped by the
multi-faceted camouflage of a narcissist, and the soul wrenching price to pay
for freedom from it."
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Te Awamutu Courier (Newspaper) 2014.
Excerpt: Cherry's story describes how she lived through toxic verbal abuse and
psychological abuse after meeting her 'soulmate' on Waiheke Island.
But...I Love You is an insightful story for anyone living in a toxic relationship.
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By Helen Maseyk April 15, 2014
I highly recommend this compelling account of a young women’s struggle and
turmoil within an abusive relationship, and the eventual realization that, with
her declining health and fragile mental state, she needed to leave,
taking her two small children with her. Easier said than done, especially as,
having eventually made the break, her perpetrator then managed to
convince the authorities that he should have custody of the children. It is easy
from this heart-breaking story to see why women stay in abusive relationships far
too long, undergoing the constant torment of physical, mental, emotional and
psychological abuse. This is a story, bravely written, to help others who may be
suffering a similar fate, and who have become innocent and helpless victims of
violence and bullying. I am a health professional working in the community with
vulnerable people who are suffering from chronic illness and post traumatic
stress, and I hear many stories from my clients of abuse from families and loved
ones. We have copies of this book in our library and I recommend it to all those
that have suffered from a similar fate.
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By Claire Castle 2014
This is a well-written, chilling account of life inside
an abusive relationship and the effort it takes to get out of one. Anyone with
an interest in the area or who is wondering if they themselves are in an abusive
relationship would benefit from reading this book, as would anyone who works
with families and children.
It was a long journey for Cherry, and she takes the reader with her every step
of the way. It was also interesting to read how a relationship can turn from
the "honeymoon period" into an abusive hell.
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Bill O'Brien, Author. 2012.
I simply wanted to congratulate you, firstly for getting out of the situation you found yourself in
and secondly for writing such a compelling account of your life. I know how much work there is
to get an idea from a blank piece of paper to a bookshelf. So from one author to another I say
well done and I wish you all the best for the future.
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-Name withheld- 2012
What an amazing story, the both of us got a lot out of Cherry's experience. I bought this book
for my daughter, she is married and has a very similar situation going on.
The book is well written and easy to read. I think it is balanced in cherry's ability to understand,
relate, except and improve her relationship. Trying her hearts best to make her relationship work,
and finally having the strength to leave when it was destroying her. cherry has learnt to be strong
and had the courage to reach out to family, friends and a higher power to make her survive
when she didn't think it was possible. Well done!
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